Example and rules Editing the Essay, Part One
Whoever has gone through the ecstasies and agonies of writing an essay knows the satisfaction (and often the sadness) of finishing. Once you have done all of the work of finding out what you want to express, arriving at an arguable and thesis that is interesting analyzing your evidence, organizing your thinking, and contending with counter-arguments, you may possibly feel that you have nothing left to accomplish but run spell-check, print it out and await your professor’s response. But what spell- check can’t discern is exactly what readers that are real think or feel if they read your essay: where they may become confused, or annoyed, or bored, or distracted. Anticipating those responses could be the job of an editor—the job you take on as you edit your own personal work.
As you proceed, keep in mind that sometimes what may seem like a small problem can mask (be a symptom of) a more substantial one. A phrase—one that is poorly-worded seems, say, unclear or vague—may just need some tweaking to correct; nonetheless it may indicate that your thinking has not developed fully yet, that you are not exactly sure what you need to express. Your language can be vague or confusing due to the fact basic idea itself is. So learning, as Yeats says, to “cast a eye that is cold in your prose is not only a matter of arranging the finishing touches on your own essay. It’s about making your essay better through the inside (clarifying and deepening your thinking and insights) and through the outside (expressing those ideas in powerful, lucid, graceful prose). These five guidelines might help.
Read your essay aloud .
Once we labor over sentences, we can sometimes lose sight associated with the larger picture, of how all the sentences sound if they’re read quickly one following the other, as your readers will read them. Whenever you read aloud, your ear will pick up some of the problems your eye might miss.
While you read your essay, recall the “The Princess therefore the Pea,” the story of a princess so sensitive she was bothered by a single pea buried underneath the pile of mattresses she lay upon. As an editor, you wish to end up like the princess—highly alert to something that seems slightly odd or “off” in your prose. Therefore if something strikes you as problematic, do not gloss over it. Investigate to discover the character of this problem. It’s likely that, if something bothers you only a little, it will bother your readers a great deal.
Be sure your entire words are doing work that is important making your argument .
Are typical of the words and phrases necessary? Or will they be just trying out space? Are your sentences tight and sharp, or are they loose and dull? Do not say in three sentences what you could say in one, and don’t use 14 words where five will do. You need every word in your sentence to include as much meaning and inflection as possible. When you see phrases like ” personal personal opinion,” ask yourself what “own personal” adds. Is not that what “my” means?
Even small, apparently unimportant words like “says” are worth your attention. In place of “says,” can you use a expressed word like argues, acknowledges, contends, believes, reveals, suggests, or claims? Words like these not just create your sentences more lively and interesting, they provide useful information: if you tell your readers that someone “acknowledges” something, that deepens their knowledge of how or why she or he said that thing; “said” merely reports.
3. Keep in mind the thought of le mot juste. Always try to look for the most perfect words, the absolute most precise and language that is specific to say that which you mean. Without needing concrete, clear language, you cannot convey to your readers precisely what you think of a topic; you are able to only speak in generalities, and everybody has recently heard those: “The evils of society are a drain on our resources.” Sentences similar to this could mean a lot of things which they wind up meaning nothing at all to your readers—or meaning something very different from everything you intended. Be specific: What evils? Which societies? What resources? Your readers are reading your words to see what you think, what you need to say.
If you’re having trouble putting your finger on simply the right word, consult a thesaurus, but simply to remind yourself of one’s options. Never choose words whose connotations or usual contexts you don’t really understand. Using language you are unfamiliar with can result in more imprecision—and that can lead your reader to question your authority.
4. Beware of inappropriately elevated language—words and phrases that are stilted, pompous, or jargony. Sometimes, in order to sound more reliable or authoritative, or higher sophisticated, we puff up our prose with this particular sort of language. Usually we only find yourself sounding like we’re attempting to sound smart—which is a sure sign to our readers that people’re not. If you find yourself inserting words or phrases as you think they will sound impressive, reconsider. Should your ideas are great, you don’t have to strain for impressive language; if they are not, that language will not help anyway.
Inappropriately elevated language can result from nouns being used as verbs. Most areas of speech function better—more elegantly—when they play the roles these were meant to play; nouns work nicely as nouns and verbs as verbs. Read the following sentences aloud, and pay attention to how pompous http://essaypro.ws/ they sound.
He exited the space. It is important that proponents and opponents of this bill dialogue about its contents before voting upon it.
Exits and dialogues work better as nouns and there are lots of ways of expressing those ideas without turning nouns into verbs.
The room was left by him. People should debate the professionals and cons of the bill before voting.
Every now and then, though, this might be a rule worth breaking, as with “He muscled his solution to the leading associated with line.” “Muscled” gives us plenty of information that may otherwise take words that are several even sentences to state. And as it’s not awkward to read through, but lively and descriptive, readers will not mind the temporary shift in roles as “muscle” becomes a verb.
5. Be tough on your own most dazzling sentences. As you revise, you will probably find that sentences you needed in earlier drafts no further belong—and these may be the sentences you’re most partial to. We’re all guilty when trying to sneak within our favorite sentences where they don’t really belong, because we can’t bear to cut them. But great writers are ruthless and can throw out brilliant lines if they’re not any longer relevant or necessary. They already know that readers will likely be less struck by the brilliance than because of the inappropriateness of these sentences and they let them go.